That Nuclear Feeling (ZTw Return: S 2, Ep. 40)

That Nuclear Feeling 1/3

I get up fairly early and am glad there’s a rug

By the side of my bed because it’s nippy these days

And I can see daylight

Through the curtains so the sun must be up.

These are the things I used to take for granted

But this morning they’re a gift

Because last night I dreamt of a nuclear explosion

Well, several, really.

Everything was destroyed and so many people were killed

And the sky was dark and full of ashes.

All I could hear was screaming, shrieking, wailing and I thought

Oh my God, it’s the end of the world

But I wake up before I die

And get up slowly, carefully, looking around.

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That Nuclear Feeling 2/3

The bluebird soars, my heart leaps and sings

On this, the most beautiful day on this most beautiful planet

Of golden honey, love, roses and music.

The joy of being alive

Today and everyday

Surrounded by harmony, magic and bliss,

What more could I wish for,

Everything is perfect, inside me and around me,

Nature embraces me and I embrace her back, crying.

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That Nuclear Feeling 3/3

I’ve been waiting for this moment for such a long time

And I’m so looking forward to what’s going to happen

Which I’m only going to catch a glimpse of

Because I’ll be dead straight after.

I just need to press this button

And all my worries disappear

Along with yours

And everybody’s.

and it’s not science fiction and it’s not ancient history

it’s still very much on the table

even if we don’t care to look

• Heen Martínez, Zaragoza, December 2023, just before Doomsday.